I would like to contribute to this board in my own way. No, this is not someone trying to follow in the footsteps of Itoko Otoko, nor is it an attempt to brag. Nay, this is an attempt to describe what happens when you have a REAL girlfriend. All you weenies who think that online = real, you can go over in the corner.
I just had my dick sucked and it was fantabulous. The only real way to get your girlfriend to do this is to VOLUNTEER IT FIRST. I'm not saying that it's a guarantee, but the whole idea is to build trust. "Hey, if you haven't had this done to you before, give it a shot. Few other dudes will volunteer it." Verbatim, this worked like a charm with my girlfriend. Yeah, at first, it wasn't so great, but eventually, she warmed up to me playing the bearded clam (Well, hers ain't so bearded) quite nicely.
I would like to point out that I am writing this on my laptop not five minutes after the Lewinsky in question. Her arm is around me as I type this. I can't imagine why she's doing that, but hey, I'm not complaining.
Anyway, here's the essence of a good blowjob: proper placement. It doesn't matter if you're not getting deepthroated, but it's cool if she's doing the right thing with her hand. The right combination of movements of mouth and hand are what makes a good BJ better than sex.
This is about as coherent as Revolution #9 by the Beatles, but she's given me road head, too. It's happened at least twice: both on the way to anime cons. This is the LIFE. Then again, it's the only way to make the state of Delaware of any interest at all. A well-phased road head will span just Delaware and nothing but. Eyes on the road, people.
So I just got a BJ and chances are you didn't. My girlfriend rocks ass at it. No, no pics, and no, I'm not some petulant little kid who is "NO RLY I JUST HAD TEHS ORGY IN GIRLS LOX0R R00M AND YOR MOM WAS THERE TO NO I REFORMAT MY GENTOO KERNEL AND RECOMPILE MEINS SLACKWARE M$ EV!L!!! LOLOLOLOLZ orz"
You neglect to realize that we are all grotesque, socially retarded outcasts who will all die vilified, hermited virgins. As such, you are really just adding insult to injury.
Who's the more pwned the 4chaners or the 4chaners that trolls them?
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Anonymous2005-11-17 14:46
>>7
Don't count me in there. I had a GF... who was horrible at sex.
I guess the best thing to do is to watch lots of pron and then teach them what to do.
What's up with dudes not wanting a face full of pussy, though? Face full of it! I had a pro (read: stripper) shove her crotch in my face once, it was fantabulous. Granted, they need to shave first, but the right words will work wonders.
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sage2005-11-17 17:42 (sage)
pssstt guys, hes posting this because it's his first blowjob.
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Anonymous2005-11-17 18:37
boring 12get
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Anonymous2005-11-18 8:29
>>10 What's up with dudes not wanting a face full of pussy, though?
Not ALL straight guys are perpetually horny, you know...
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Anonymous2005-11-18 12:03
Vaginas are gross. I would rather just fuck it.
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Anonymous2005-11-18 21:07
Lol @ bragging on the internet
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Anonymous2005-11-18 21:10
Lol @ bragging on top of posting at Lounge on top of being anonymous
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Anonymous2005-11-19 7:52
DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS
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Anonymous2005-11-20 10:00
I REFORMAT MY GENTOO KERNEL AND RECOMPILE MEINS SLACKWARE M$ EV!L!!! LOLOLOLOLZ orz
Silly, I'm not talking about all the time. Just when you're in the mood for some rink-a-dink.
Now, some poontang is a little odd, but if you play it right you're not going to be going out with a loose 29 year old former stripper who's looser than Kanye West on television. Good poon is a sight to behold.
I think most dudes would love to explore every spot on her any way they can. Of course, it can get really stinky down there, but that's a hygene issue, not a preference issue.
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Anonymous2005-11-22 9:32
Blow job should be abolished,I think.
'Cause it's against social rules.
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Anonymous2005-11-22 14:04
>>23
Troll
My social rule is that getting it blowed by a hot chick is a very good sign, like saying "hello!", but nicer.
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Anonymous2005-11-22 21:11
Do you like it when she looks up at you when she's playing the flute?
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Anonymous2005-11-23 3:59
>>25
I do; I also like to push her head in and cum on her throat.
I've had my dick sucked lots of times.
But I'd still rather ``reformat'' my Gentoo kernel and ``recompile'' my Slackware any day.
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Anonymous2010-12-26 5:04
>>32
So how's /prog/ these days? I finally left for good when there was all the opiates spam and mega-necroposting a few months ago.
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Anonymous2010-12-26 8:27
>>33
Are you OP? If so, then I don't believe you ever understood much that was said anyway. If not, you should know you are missing out on quite a bit.
hahahaha, so you were a virgin and you just had your first bj. you gave yourself away, basically..
I got a blowjob once from my girlfriend in a train. There were two other folks in the wagon. She wanted to be a surprise, she unziped my pants and pulled it out and sucked my dick while I was watching so that no one would see us. It was the coolest blowjob I had. But I had many others that felt better, though none in a train wagon.
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy