Who here has been single all their life.

（´Д｀;;) i get really nervous around girls for some reason, especially when i like them. Is it game over for me?

I don't know if im capable to fall in love.
It's not that i don't like girls. I just feel like i have no chance to get a girlfriend, even though i try to convince myself that it's not true. I have to mention that i have mild asperger syndrome. Even though i admit having the syndrome, it's hard for me to relate it to myself. Yet it may explain some of the social failures i make, but yet not.
I just sometimes feel like life is too boring to bother myself with it, or as most of the time it's very shallow.
Why is life shallow, why is love shallow.
I sometimes can feel bitterness towards shallow people, who won't show their thoughts and feelings. Everyone is shallow, everyone is afraid of eachother.

And those who mock me or anyone who wants to tear down these shallow appearances. You have left yourself outside the possibility to feel relieved that you may be accepted.

Yes I know these are just mighty words, and no real action.
I know i'm not good to make reality of things i say. But i only feel that life is shallow.
Even though i show signs, where i interact well with other people. I can't get away from the fact, that i only feel that life is shallow. And i don't want a relationship with a girl, where the purpose is to console my feelings. I really want to love someone, but i don't know if i can.
Am I a apathetic person?
Is it apathy that rule our world?
Is apathy the natural state of emotion for humans?
These may be very philosophical questions, but they're universal.

Or should i see the world in a cynical and shallow tone?


Btw i'm 20 y.o., male