I will teach you Sign language!

Oh damn its a text board :'(

Oh well. Make your hands into fists, and then hit your wrists (palm site) together, and that's a word for fuck (implying 'in the ass', as i understand it). Or make a K handshape with both hands, and hit your wrists together for the normal version. point to someone afterward to explain to whom the fuking will be done.

Make a thumbs up sign with both of your hands, and hold one of the thumbs with your other hand. then pull the bottom thumbs-up hand out for the word "shit". You can spread teh fingers of the bottom hand and give it a rapid, spraying motion for "diarreha", or you can make a face and keep your fists together to mean constipation.

Make face your palm at someone to mean "your". Make your hand into the "five" shape and tap your thumb to your chin to mean "mom".

Point to yourself for "I". Choose one of the various "fuck" signs for "fucked". Hold a palm out to someone for "your/his/her". Make both your hands into 'gun' or "L" shapes, and touch one of them to your chin, then move it down to touch the other hand, for "sister".

Make the 'ok' sign (touching your index finger to your thumb with the other fingers spread) with one hand, then use the index finger of your other hand to move in circles around the inner rim of the OK sign for "asshole".

lol

lesson two! foodstuffs.

Point to yourself for "I". The sign for 'eat' is pretty obvious as well, just make your hand look like you're holding a chip or something, and put it near your mouth. The sign for 'dead' is like this: http://www.lifeprint.com/asl101/gifs-animated/die.gif
Hold your arms as if you're cradling a baby, and that's the word for "baby/babies".

One of my favourite signs is the sign for milkshake. You use only one hand for it. For the word milk, you hold out your hand and open it and close it, making sqeezing motions, like you're milking a cow. For shake, you make your hand a fist and shake it up and down. The resulting compound word looks like you're jerking off :D

penis: http://www.lifeprint.com/asl101/signjpegs/u/urinat3.jpg
vagoo: use your thumbs and forefingers to make the shape of a vagina. (fingers point down, thumbs are up)

Hold your hand out next to you as if you are patting the head of a child for "little". Then you can run your thumb along your cheek for 'girls' or make a "talking" motion with your hand near the top of your head for 'boys' (the motion is as if you are grabbing the front of a baseball cap).