Windows-compatible forum/board software?

I want to add a 4chan-style text-only board to a website located on a Windows server.  That means right off the bat that I can't use perl or PHP.  I tried the very old AgNEs, but I was barred from running the executable off the website.

Any suggestions?

Get a better web host?

Get a life?

Lol I had to set up a chan style board for my computer class. Sadly, out of the options of Futallaby, Kareha, Wakaba, Kusabav, Shiichan (I realize that they are not all text only boards) they all require either php, perl, or some god forsaken module for the server...
Easiest option: Set up a home machine with XAMPP and use Futallaby (easy as hell).

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I can't use perl or PHP
barred from running the executable off the website
That's like asking for a cone of ice cream, but without the ice cream because you're lactose intolerant.

how many fields does the table for futallby need?

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