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Minecraft sucks

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-11 23:55

I got Minecraft (Alpha) yesterday. I played for a few hours. I made a castle, a dungeon, and a house. I realized that's pretty much what the entire game was. It's like Legos, but slower and you can kill stuff. If you're thinking about getting it, the free version is almost exactly the same. The weapons/enemies don't really add anything to the game. Don't waste 9.95 Euros on it.

Name: Anonymous 2011-11-02 7:11

Less than a year ago Minecraft made itself known as a brutal survival game that was designed to sweettalk you and then fuck you up. Now it's the exact opposite. An army of over 9000 faggots came and FUCKED WITH OUR GAME!

Protip 1: The argument "its still in beta" means nothing as it is just an excuse to sell a buggy game that is in all reality released. Get that through your heads. It is already "released" as everyone in the public has access to buying it and it is a moderately well known game. Learn the meaning of "released" retards.

Protip 2: Minecraft will never be out of beta. Notch has proven again and again that he has absolutely no idea of what "alpha", "beta" and "release" means. (Just look at the "beta prereleases" that's actually just alpha versions that you have to pay more for.) Notch will probably "release" Minecraft around the set date, but it will continue (just as before) to require updates and bug fixes. Just as with the beta release, nothing will have actually changed.

Protip 3: Notch is into scat and animal sex. It's no secret that Curse is favoring furries and banning normal people. Furries are parading all over that forum. Of course they're going to suggest animal breeding to Notch enough times for him to cave in to their demands - all the reasonable people have been banned. Also, what's more dirty than "entering love mode"?

Protip 4: Minecraft is stolen code, so its a different programming language so what. Notch just directly copied the code variables into a different language. Infiniminer, Roblox, and various other games and mods come to mind. He also steals peoples ideas for mods.

Protip 5: Minecraft is boring. Minecrafts creative mode has all the excitement of lego. Only retards find Minecraft "a challenging game". Second of all, Minecraft players are WORSE than kids, because the later versions have made things so easy that Minecraft is now played by drooling morons who can't handle the "Easy" difficulty level of other games. Imagine what sort of people CoD would attract if the enemies came at you just waving sticks. Then the game would not even pose a challenge for kids - not normal ones. If a game designer has any decency, he keeps true to his original vision and makes a separate game for kids. In the case of Minecraft you already had creative mode, even the ability to turn off monsters completely, and was allowed to cheat to get unlimited blocks, but when Notch made the ENTIRE game unplayable, he ruined it. Non-morons can't play Minecraft right now because there is no challenge anywhere to be found. It's a complete waste of time.

Protip 6: Minecraft is not a "creative game" when all you do is make stuff that everyone else has already made or copy designs of the golden gate bridge. That is called mimicry. Often what you see on YouTube is people scanning in pictures and building replicas of real-world houses, when they're not just building standard castles. Probably the best point made against the "if you don't like it your not creative enough" argument. Obviously they are not creative. And are they really being creative at all? All I ever see is just people doing and making the same shit all the time. Or they are making shit that other people have made. Or just copying popular images or old architectural designs that are then translated into the crappy one size fits all minecraft blocks. Creativity means making something yet unseen or something you have not seen or heard of before. Look what creativity really means, it up retards.

Protip 7: Minecraft is also not creative because all you do is build out of 40 diffrent 1x1 blocks. Lego does better then that. http://www.spareblocks.com/

Protip 8: Pedobears and 10 year old furfags play the game, oh and retarded people.  Minecraft is created by retards for retards, by furries for furries. They invaded about a year ago and Curse banned everyone else, and it's THE meeting place for retards and furries right now. Studies have been done that link autism and asbergers with mincraft. You derp kids came to Minecraft because you liked what you saw. You liked what you saw because Notch began tailoring Minecraft to suit derp kids, a place where they could "derp" as much as they wanted, while making sure that hardcore players who took games seriously were banned. Notch is intentionally creating a haven for you, where adults aren't allowed (unless they think they're magical animals).

Protip 9: I get my dick sucked by not playing minecraft. Never met any girl thinks Minecraft is a turn-on.

Protip 10: The smart people and kids are far too smart to waste their time with Minecraft. So you must be tarded.

Protip 11: The graphics still suck. But really It's not the graphics. It's the mechanics and the players. Minecraft started out as a decent game at first because it had a challenge, but along came fifty thousand children and carried off Notch into fagland. They whined and whined about how they couldn't survive with torches and cookies and peaceful mode and all the colors of the rainbow. For 1 decent human being there are 100 retards in this world. Guess who wins? Then Curse came along - the team that now runs Minecrafts "unofficial" forums - and Notch gave the mods there orders to ban anyone who was over the age of 21 and wasn't a furfag. He sold out the userbase to furries and children. Graphics can be fixed with texture packs. The game can not. Even if Notch would fix it, the old players won't be coming back for a second humiliation.

"The beginning of the 2000 millenia saw a huge drop in IQ levels, resulting in a new dark age, where gibbering idiots played games like Minecraft, hanging out with magical fairies and rainbows, instead of developing their brains by facing any sort of challenges. Before this type of electronical cannabis was outlawed in 2050, it destroyed the brains of most of humanity."
- Future Dictionary

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