HI, I'M TONY SOPRANO, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE FAMOUS HBO DRAMA SERIES, "THE SOPRANOS". WHILE I HAVE BEEN PLEASURING MYSELF TO THE PICTURES YOUR MOTHER PUTS UP ONLINE, AND SCREWING EVERY OTHER WHORE'S BUTTOCKS ON THE EASTERN SIDE OF THE MISSISSIPPI, I HAVE NEVER FELT A WHOLER MAN THAN WHEN I CLEAVED HER IN TWO WITH MY GIANT TROUSER TORPEDO. THAT NIGHT WAS LIKE UNTO A DREAM AS I TOOK MY SILVERY SWORD AND POUNDED HER COCK-LOVING BACKSIDE. IT WAS THE RAPTURE; HER ANAL CLEFT WAS THE GREAT SEA, AND I WAS ITS MOSES. I GUARANTEE IT.