I need to learn how to use Access. I'm trying to make a calculator of sorts where users enter in simple information to calculate an answer specific to that person's responses.
Any help?
Name:
Anonymous2007-10-10 5:13
And MS Access strikes you as the best way to do this?
Name:
Anonymous2007-10-10 11:31
any other suggestions?
Name:
Anonymous2007-10-10 12:53
I have to agree with >>2. Access sounds like the wrong tool for this job. A conventional programming language might be better. Whatever you know, e.g. C++, Java, Python, Perl, Ruby, Scheme, etc. This problem is probably so simple, the choice of language doesn't even matter much.
<rant>I never saw the point of Access. Naive users would be better off storing data in Excel, whereas professional developers should use SQL Server.</rant>
>>6
For reports, I'd prefer Crystal Reports. For forms, I find Perl/Catalyst (never saw the point in learning Ruby/Rails) useful for CRUD screens.
Unless you've special needs (e.g. graphics, sound), I think the Web browser should be your user interface. Databases typically have no such special needs.
Name:
Anonymous2007-10-11 21:31
I have special needs. My boss. I don't know why so don't ask. Boss wont budge, what can I do.
Name:
Chris Logan Hanssen2007-10-11 22:22
In humans, defecation may occur (depending on the individual and the circumstances) from once every two or three days to several times a day. Hardening of the feces may cause prolonged interruption in the routine and is called constipation.
Human fecal matter varies significantly in appearance, depending on diet and health. Normally it is semisolid, with a mucus coating. Its brown coloration comes from a combination of bile and bilirubin, which comes from dead red blood cells.
In newborn babies, fecal matter is initially yellow/green after the meconium. This coloration comes from the presence of bile alone. In time, as the body starts expelling bilirubin from dead red blood cells, it acquires its familiar brown appearance, unless the baby is breast feeding, in which case it remains soft, pale yellowish, and not-unpleasantly scented until the baby begins to eat significant amounts of other food.
Throughout the life of an ordinary human, one may experience many types of feces. A "green" stool is from rapid transit of feces through the intestines (or the consumption of certain blue or green food dyes in quantity), and "clay-like" appearance to the feces is the result of a lack of bilirubin.
Bile overload is very rare, and not a health threat. Problems as simple as serious diarrhea can cause blood in one's stool, turning it black. Black stools caused by blood usually indicate a problem in the intestines (the black blood is digested), whereas red streaks of blood in stool are usually caused by bleeding in the rectum or anus.
Food may sometimes make an appearance in the feces. Common undigested foods found in human feces are seeds, nuts, corn and beans, mainly because of their high Dietary fiber content. Artifical food coloring in some processed foods such as highly colorful packaged breakfast cereals can also cause unusual feces coloring if eaten in sufficient quantities.
>>14
Hanssen's on the right track. He's implying that when the boss tells you to do something stupid, then it's time for the Mad Shitter to strike the workplace. Each morning, a pile of freshly extruded turds should be sitting ready for him on his desk. Eventually he'll get the message and will stop making absurd demands, and then the Mad Shitter can fade into a well-deserved retirement.
And as as further note, the Mad Shitter can't just be a wild pooper. The guy's gotta have skill in the matter. For example, any Mad Shitter knows that the disciplinary shitting has to be perfect. A perfect shit is firm enough to retain consistency, yet is wet enough to leave a stain. Any Mad Shitter worth his paper would ensure that his diet during the shitting period was rigorously controlled to produce these perfect turds.
Granted, in times of a "Shitwar", when fully punitive actions are required, the Mad Shitter may alter his diet to produce crazy shits. In times of Shitwar, desks must be liberally spattered with near-diarrhea effluent, to convey the deep hatred of the affair.