Who are your absolute favorite writers?

Of fiction and/or non-fiction

Mine are Christopher Hitchens, William F. Buckley Jr., Ernest Hemingway, and Edward Gibbon.

I'm not much of a reader of fiction, so that may be why I like Hemingway.
Otherwise, I enjoy reading journalism, essays, and some history. And I love the way the above write.

Haruki Murakami and Vladimir Nabokov.

Those are the only two authors who I'm comfortable calling my favorite.

Dr. Seuss

Shakespeare

Steven Brust

Joseph Heller

John Updike and Raymond Chandler.

Dante (the famous poet, NOT the guy from Clerks)

>>8
the guy from devil may cry writes poetry?

Charles Dickens

Robert Holdstock, Larry Niven, Haruki Murakami, Alexandre Dumas

Paul Auster or Robert E. Howard

Kafka and Dostoyevsky

After eating most of the calf I look at myself in the mirror. There is grease all over my face. And then I start to eat at random. I bite her little toe. It still smell of her feet. I stab the knife into her arch and see the red meat deep inside. I thrust my fingers inside and dig out the meat and put it in my mouth. It tastes okay. Then I stab the knife into her armpit. Ever since I saw it under her yellow sleeveless top I wondered how it would taste this good.  The wonderful taste cheers me up and I devour her underarm up to the elbow.

Finally I cut off her private parts. When I touch the pubic hair it has a very bad smell. I bite her clit, but it won't come off, it just stretches.  So I throw it in the frying pan and pop it in my mouth. I chew very carefully and swallow it. It is so sweet.

After I swallow it, I feel her in my body and get hot. I turn the body over and open her buttocks, revealing her anus. I scoop it out with my knife and try to put it in my mouth. It smells too much. I put it in the frying pan and throw it in my mouth. It still smells. I spit it out. I go into the next room. It smell of fat, like I've been frying a chicken.

It's been twenty-four hours now. Some huge flies hover and buzz in the bathroom. I try to chase them away, but they came back. They swarm on her face. They seem to tell me that I've lost her forever. It is no longer her. Where is she? She's gone far away. I've broken her. Like a child who breaks his toy. I try to use an electric knife to cut her body. It doesn't work. It just makes a loud sound. I use a hatchet. I strike several times. It's hard work. I strike her thigh. Her body jumps up. If she could feel, it would have hurt.

Finally the thigh separates from her body. I bite it again, like I would bite a chicken leg. Then I cut off her arms. It is even harder than the thigh. I use the electric knife again. It makes a shrill sound, like the sound of her shrill voice. It works this time. Her hand still wears a ring and a bracelet. When I see her long fingers I am driven by another impulse. I use her hand to masturbate. Her long fingers excite me.

When I'm finished I try to bite her finger. I can't. I'm disappointed. I put her hands into the plastic bag along with her legs. And then I see her face. It is still quiet. She has a small nose and a sweet lower lip. When she was alive I wanted to bite them. Now I can satisfy that desire. It's so easy to bite off her nose. As I chew the cartilage I can hear the noise. I use a knife to cut off more of the cartilage and put it in my mouth. It really doesn't taste very good. I scoop out her lower lip with my knife and put it in my mouth. It has hard skin. I decide to eat it later when I can fry it. So I put it in the refrigerator.

>>9

I wish I could hate you to death.

>>15
That's probably a troll.

Shakespeare, Donne, T.S. Eliot, Marquez, Borges.

>>16
>>15
you two are fucking retards

>>14
I feel retarded for not knowing who wrote this, assuming this because no one else has asked that they know, but fuck, who wrote this!?

>>18
The text is part of Issei Sagawa's confession. Sagawa killed, fucked, and ate – in that order – a Dutch woman while studying at the Sorbonne in 1981. Following his release, he has gone on to minor fame in his native Japan.

Orwell

Mines are Lovecraft, Tolkien, George Martin, Isabel Allende

>>21

You mean George Martin of "lemoncakes and rape" fame? He's a shit writer, tbh, albeit with some meagre skill at plot-writing.

Also, his one claim to fame is a half-finished series that he hasn't worked on for several years. He basically spends his entire year going around the geeky RPG convention circuit, picking up the latest batch of geeky female groupies to do god only knows what with his obese walrus body, then after suffocating the last one beneath his oozing mass he blogs about some football for a while, and then he shovels lemoncakes and pizza down his throat.

Mine's Thomas Hardy. He finished all of his works, btw, and actually knew how to write with skill.

Walter Moers.

Not gonna say why, just google him. 99% of the pretentious fags on /book/ scoff at this type of literature.

>>23
I found on Wikipedia he wrote a comic about Hitler called "Adolf". Incidentally Osamu Tezuka did the exact same thing 15 years earlier except it's not similar to the other one at all. Wow

Michael Marshall Smith

Faulkner, Hunter S. Thompson (for his journalism more than Fear and Loathing), Cormac McCarthy, Charles Bukowski, Philip Roth.

>>27
Wow. You must be a real man's man.

Gene Wolfe, Glen Cook, Ursula K. Le Guin, Patrick Rothfuss, Clive Barker

Kurt Vonnegut, Douglas Adams, Cormac McCarthy

as far as non-fiction goes I don't really have a favorite, I guess I could say Christopher Hitchens, but I like listening to him lecture or debate than reading his stuff. I enjoyed all of Bill Bryson's stuff... I dunno I read so much of it as a history graduate...

Harlan Ellison, Roald Dahl, Vonnegut, Lovecraft, Douglas Adams