"Crazy people will pronounce themselves ruler of the Sovereign Nation of Tittyfartsylvania or President of Madeuplandington with some regularity."
Stop stereotyping. Even those of us with deviated mentalities understand the basics of governing models, and know full well that dictatorships and tyrannies are failed, unsustainable models for places like Tittyfartsylvania. I mean, sure- if we want our country to have a stagnant economy and be technologically hobbled decades behind other sovereign, rival nations with democracies like Bonerswallowpia, we'll declare martial law on our entire populace of decorative Hummel figurines and rule with a tinfoil-wrapped-to-simulate-Iron Fist, and just wait for the day we're hauled away in exile after we mistakenly chase the Census Taker from our lawns dressed in cardboard viking armor with a plastic battle-axe. No- we fully understand that the world around us is a complex, interconnected community of sovereign nations founded upon the core common principles that we ALL share: a psychotic split from reality brought on when our wives leave. But we do not just DECLARE ourselves to be some sort of infallible RULER! Like any civilized society, we hold an election every 4 years and our 17 cats decide who is best suited to LEAD our nation. I narrowly lost to Mr. Fluffy-kins this year, and had it not been for his remark that "47% of pets in this household are freeloaders who feel entitled to back-scratchings and saucers of milk", then it might be HIM writing this comment to you instead! Due to the fact that this isn't the case, we are still free to enjoy hookers and blackjack.