Im Really Depressed

Ever since I turned 16 Ive Felt depressed all my days up to now.
Maybe I blame myself for not being grown up. Im Very childish. No one has any love for me. My Family dosnt really care all to much what happens to me. My friends only use me. My Ex never loved me. My father only gives a fuck about himself. I have no heard or spoken to him in Several Years.

My Life just dosnt get any better. It just dosnt
Ive seriously lost my will to live, and i am yet still young.
Ive faced alot of harsh cold realities in my life. And this sorrow just stays in me. I cant escape this pain and it drives me insane.

I want to talk to someone. Not even my own mother will answer the phone.  I have no money and i havnt eaten in over 3 days now. My boss called me yesterday and ask me to come in and work for A Day. But i didnt show up today.. Last night was horrible. I havnt slept in Two days. But this morning I had Slept Finally..
I end up usually crying everyday as well. Im in such pain all the time. Everyone looks at my face, and they can truly feel my sorrow.  Im SUFFERING REALLY BAD all the time. I ffeeel much worse is to come in my life. much worse. Much worse much worse it will just get worse.  I wish i was suicidal i wish i were dead. i wish i were dead i wish i were dea/i cant stop cring. I dont understand myself, I dont do well with people...niether. People Expect me to be more communicative and out there.I cant shake these feelings from me, I am always faced with these horrible porblems, and in the end they kill me. My streess, ancieties, i break downn.


I have done my best in the past to try and impress my boss's ALWAYS Tried REally Hard, and ive always put more effort into things than anyone else has. Bit in a few months, people disrespect me, they get tired of me.  Why should i go do my best when all i get in return is a slap in the face. Shit jobs where people Treat you like shit. Small Towns where peoples minds are small.[

I dont know where i want to go in life anymore, i dont know what to do. Im always stuck within myself crawling around in my mind going insane each day.  I guess when i fall hard againm andm i will cry so hard again to god that he will actually help ,e out, and he willl somehow he dose. I should have nothing to fear but i do. Even when i should have died i am still alive. It just wouldnt be possible for me to still be here if it wasnt for hd. Perhaps i let the world beat me down, and then god grants me to do better or soemthing. but i am always filled with sorrow. Sometimes in my sleep there is still sorrow. SORROW SORROW SORROW SORROW
Sorrow is a Sick wound ,
For What its worth though. its probably best that.. one bad egg in society, must stumble along the ground deathed. So that others are more privilaged. And that i am not filthy like them. Maybe i am an extremist ideals. Thinking that society is wrong, and not delievered in a proper manner.
Where we are all common men, and we are all selfishly competing against one another.  I live off the scraps of life. I fear people, there the worst thing to have ever been discovered.  They tell my i AM SO PERSISTANT! Persistancy is Strength it is courhae it is wisdom, it is far crreater trait that you and no other shall have becuase you are weak mninded coward fools. o one will be able to stand by me becuiase i am far great man.  Great men who do not have a voice, Great men who will die becuase choose not to accept some of the worst things in life to actually try and live through. A man should be free. AND I SAY THE MODERN WORLSD IS KILLING MODERN MAN. IT WILL BE FOR HUNDREDS OF THOUSNADS OF YEARS. IT WILL NEVER GET ANYBETTER FOR HUMANITY.
I wish a man like myself.. Could just be a man, and be able to live off hjis land the way he wants to. the way it is meant for a creature to survive. Not through the means have having people demand  over another. TO SPIT LINGER IN HIS FACE, To speak babble noonsense in to what religions he dose not veleive in the first place. Why Should i young man, put up with older disgracful bastards.

I am extremly strong, extremly smart. Extremly Kind hearted. PErhaps om a little TOO fucking good. Anmd maybe that is why others TREAT ME WITH LITTLE OR NO RESPECt.

Im so angry at society. And those who managed to be selfish to join its perverse is currupt.

People dont have any hearts anymore.

get drugs, it's easy enough

>>3
Fock Off. I quit the drugs 3 weeks ago.

>>4
different meds

>>5
MEds cost to much to blow money on

I read it all. Congratulations!

>>7
D=

What an emo bastard.

Turn to DRUGS! :]

SUMMARY:

1. CRAWWWWWWLING IIIIIIN MYYYYYY SKIIIIIIIN THESE WORRRRRRDS THEY WILL NOT HEAAAAAAAAAAL

2. ...In West Philadelphia Born And Raised...

Actually I phoned one of my Boss;s Today. Someone i previously worked for and on occasion still work for. I guess he was a little bit Fucked in the head today. Because I asked him if he wants me to work for him, then i am to be Full Employed not just, one or two days out of the month. And he didn't have the DECENCY to at least say goodbye when we hung up. So its just to prove my theory even more. Than people who have money and business etc, are way too corrupt and selfish, and play peoples lives as if it was theres to control.

>>11

Nice Try Idiot :)

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread.
I went to Yoshinoya a while ago; you know, Yoshinoya?
Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "150 yen off" written on it.
Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
You, don't come to Yoshinoya just because it's 150 yen off, fool.
It's only 150 yen, 1-5-0 YEN for crying out loud.
There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some Yoshinoya, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, daddy's gonna order the extra-large." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll give you 150 yen if you get out of those seats.
Yosinoya should be a bloody place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped table can start a fight at any time,
the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start eating, and then the bastard beside me goes "extra-large, with extra sauce."
Who in the world orders extra sauce nowadays, you moron?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to eat it with extra sauce?"
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "extra sauce"?
Coming from a Yoshinoya veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra green onion.
That's right, extra green onion. This is the vet's way of eating.
Extra green onion means more green onion than sauce. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key.
And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable.
However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the employees from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to amateurs.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with today's special.

I HOPE YOU DIE

I was once not very much unlike yourself.
Though I manged to replace my Teen Angst with racism, I recommend you do it too.
It's amazing how many things you can justifiably blame the Jews, Niggers and Chinks for and its allot of fun.
You'll have goals in life, like creating a white nation or something. Or you could just give all other races a really hard time'n shit for being so inferior.
I highly recommendz it.

PS: If you're black/Jewish/Chink you've already failed at life and should just kill yourself.

PS: If you're >>1 you've already failed at life and should just kill yourself