The scientific way to lose weight

Forget about pills, diets and exercise. We're going to use fucking thermodynamics.
Your fatass body is a heat engine, designed to keep mammals warm and alive.
Every day you lose heat to maintain that warmth, this burns calories but not enough to lose weight.
Now we have a way to take that little engine to overdrive.
Fill a bathtub with cold water(cold but not too cold), get in for 6 hours and enjoy.
In the time you'll lose calories like extreme full day exercise but without moving a muscle.

Totally impractical. You can't do much of anything while marinating in water for 6hr. In contract, you could exercise by performing physical activity and actually get stuff done.