Define life

Just wondering about /sci/'s definition of life. None of that made of cells bullcrap. Bonus points for answers which adequately handle fire, viruses, corporations, and artificial intelligence.

Best answer will recieve a box containing a simulation of a universe whose denizens are just on the verge of discovering that their world is a simulation.

Being "alive" is just a social construct. We decide something is alive, thus it is alive. We decide something is dead, then it is dead. You can't measure life anymore than you can measure the color red.