God exists.

I'm god, so.. I guess I'll take a request to prove I exist.

ARGUMENT FROM KARMA
(1) There are persons who are unusually beautiful and powerful both in this life and in the life after death.
(2) Therefore, there must be a supreme authority who is able to award the respective benefits of our present activities.
(3) Only God could be the supreme authority.
(4) Therefore, God exists.

ARGUMENT FROM EVERYTHING
(1) God is everything.
(2) You can’t doubt everything – am I right?
(3) Therefore, God exists.

ARGUMENT FROM HUMAN BEHAVIOR
(1) If we evolved from monkeys, we should behave like monkeys.
(2) We don't behave like monkeys.
(3) Therefore, God exists.

ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF EVIDENCE
(1) Any evidence would be against faith.
(2) Without faith, God is nothing.
(3) Faith exists.
(4) Therefore, God is not nothing and evidence for God's existence cannot exist.
(5) Therefore, God exists.

ARGUMENT FROM TERMINOLOGY
(1) There are hundreds of proofs of god's existence.
(2) When you call something a 'proof', that means you have shown the result to be true.
(3) Therefore, God exists.

ARGUMENT FROM GILDA RADNER
(1) What's all this fuss I hear about whether God exits?
(2) Well of course he does!
(3) If I'm going to go somewhere else, I have to exit this room.
(4) And God's been everywhere, so he must have done a lot of exiting.
(5) Therefore, God exits.
(6) Oh.  That's different.  Never mind.