13th Elul, is the day of the passing of M"R Hakham Yosef Hayyim, zy'a"a, the Ben Ish Hai. When Hakham Yosef Hayyim, 'a"h, was about eight years old, he and his sister were arguing as to who should hold the candle for the Habdalah on Saturday night. Their father, Hakham Eliyahu Hayyim, 'a"h, turned to his young son Yosef and told him that if his reason for holding the candle was for mere pleasure, then his sister should take precedence, because she was the younger one. If, on the other hand, it was because he had a deeper understanding of the meaning of Habdalah, then he could be the one to hold it.
Annulling vows (Hattarath Nedarim), must be done by a Beth Din of three men. Even though a Beth Din ordinarily may not include relatives of the one appearing before them, annulling vows is different. Since no judgment is actually passed, the three who are sitting to annul the vows, may include a relative of the one who is requesting that his vow be annulled.
This applies to annulments done on behalf of an individual. If it is for the congregation, however, the annulment may be done on Shabbath, even if it is not for the purpose of Shabbath. This is because the entire community gathers in the Synagogue on Shabbath and the annulment can take place. If it would not be done on Shabbath, the people would not come during the week and the annullment could not take place.
During the four special Shabbathoth (Shabbath Shubah, Haggadol, Zakhor & Kallah), the Ben Ish Hai, Hakham Yoseph Hayyim, 'a"h, had the Zekhuth to be the only Hakham in his city of Baghdad, to give a Derasha. He would stand there speaking, while wearing his Tallith Gadol (Sissith), for approximately four hours. This took place in the "Slat Il Kbiri" (the Great Synagogue). According to some reports, as many as 10,000 people would assemble inside and around the Synagogue, to hear him. His Derashoth were a combination of homilies, stories and Halakha. When he spoke, his voice would resonate throughout the Synagogue. Even in old age, the enormous crowd could hear his voice.
If one makes an oath (Shebu'ah), not to keep a commandment specified in the Torah, such as Sissith (ציצית), Tefillin (תפלין), or Massah (מצה), it is considered a Torah transgression, because it was an oath that was made in vain. As such, one is still obligated to perform the commandment.
Vows and oaths may be annulled at night. Even though judgments may not be issued at night, we mentioned previously that no judgments are delivered in this case and, therefore, it is permitted. For the same reason, certain vows and oaths are permitted to be annulled, even on Shabbath.
If One Waited Intentionally Between Qiddush and the Meal
Friday, August 16, 2013/Elul 10, 5773
We mentioned that after Qiddush the meal should be eaten right away ( http://www.atorahminute.com/2013-08-09 ). It should be noted, however, that there are those who are of the opinion that even if one intends to eat the meal an hour or two after the Qiddush, one has still fulfilled one's obligation. Because of this, even if one deliberately delays eating after the Qiddush, one should not recite the blessings again, because whenever there is a difference of opinion (doubt) about blessings, we do not recite them. As such, if this happens at night, before starting the meal one should say the blessing of the Qiddush in one's mind, or say it loudly without mentioning G-d's Name and Kingdom.
Mistakenly Believing Something Is Forbidden Monday, August 5, 2013/Ab 29, 5773
If someone accepted that something permitted was forbidden, because he was under the impression that the Halakha was such, but later discovered that it was perfectly permissible, it is considered to be a Neder (vow) made in error. In such a case, it is as if nothing happened, and no annulment of vows is required.
לא תראה את שור אחיך או את שיו נדחים והתעלמת מהם השב תשיבם לאחיך "You shall not see your brother's ox or sheep go astray, and turn a blind eye; you shall surely return them to your brother" (Debarim 22:1).
The Torah commands us to be exceedingly particular about returning a lost item to its owner. One should not say, "Why should I care, he should take better care of his possessions". Rabbenu Bahyei states that this comes to teach us that we are all one people, with one Father, and that everyone should be concerned about the well-being of his friend and his possessions.
If One Forgot to Stipulate That a Fast Was Beli Neder Sunday, August 4, 2013/Ab 28, 5773
If one adopted the custom of fasting a private fast, such as Rosh Hodesh and so on, without first stipulating that one was not taking on the commitment to fast as a Neder (vow), and then subsequently did not wish to fast, because he was unable to, or for some other reason, then the following is required. He must do Hattarath Nedarim (the repealing of the vow), and start by regretting the fact that he took on this custom without first specifying that he was doing it Beli Neder (without making a vow to do so). One must be careful not to say that one regrets the previous fasts that one already fasted, because one may not regret positive actions that one did.
Additionally, if when making the Qiddush, one's intention was not to eat the meal in the same place as the Qiddush, and not only that, but one did not intend to eat right away, but subsequently changed one's mind and ate in the same place immediately, one fulfills one's obligation of Qiddush.