I want...

A language that:
- Can be compiled to native code.
- Can use OO abstractions.
- Is not Java.
- Is not C++.
- Is not C#.

What I am searching for?

I want a language that...

A language that:
 - Cooks
 - Cleans
 - Sucks my dick
 - Takes it up the ass
 - Doesn't bitch
 - 100% faithful
 - Doesn't spend money
 - Doesn't talk