/prog/ Roleplaying character sheet

Alignment: caotic good;
Mastered languages: C, C++;
Well Known languages: Python;
Known languages: Java, Various Assembly;
WannaKnow languages: Haskell, Perl;
Hated languages: PHP, Pascal, Java
Ultimate (possibly evil) plan: Rule the world;
Catchphrase: "You noob";
Per-day ability: Ballmer peak.

Everybody here's a master of C? What did you faggots do to accomplish this? Coded a new driver that was merged in by Linus? Give me a break.