I'm new to sex: which hole to choose?

As the title says, I'm new to sex, I've only ever done basic and slightly advanced  masturbation, and I know that is pretty limited in what it can/can't do. I hear that anus is the main hole on this board, but I've also heard that its dirty and dangerous, someone even told me that I can get haxed through it, is that true?

A couple people told me mouth is a good hole to start, and I know a lot of couples use it, and I've also heard vagina, between-tits and a few others.

I've heard of these unprotected and protected sex things, and I believe prostitute and girlfriend, can anyone explain the difference? I've been involved in masurbation for most of my life, and I think it's time to advance my sex skills, and I could think of no better place than 4chan's /prog/, namely because I don't know of any other places, so....

Can /prog/ help me?

It disappoints me to see pathetic emotions coming from /prog/. We conjure spirits, for fuck's sake. That this doesn't give you the confidence to not feel limited in going after what you want is an insult to the very art and profession of computer programming