ITT: The 21st century version of "When I was a kid I had to walk five miles in the snow every morning to get to school, so you can get your lazy ass up at 5AM and walk too, because I sure as hell ain't driving you."
I'm really sorry you wasted all those years learning C++ and Java and php or w/e guise, but I'm afraid your "skills" just aren't needed as much as they used to be.