/prog/'s own esoteric language

Fun idea. Let's make our own programming language.
Conditions:
Must be somewhat useful like ABC.
Not limited to characters only. Can include words.
1 function per post.

>>137
Your memes are not e/g/in enou/g/h, /g/roski! Please use more e/g/in memes if you really want to get famous on Re/g/g/it.

Install LE /g/entoo, le pleb.