ITT the ABC Programming Language

#include <stdio.h>

int main(int argc,char argv*[]){
  int i = 0;
  int BUFFA;

  while(argv[i]!='\0'){
    if(argv[i]='a')
      BUFFA++;
    else if(argv[i]='b')
      BUFFA--;
    else if(argv[i]='c')
      printf("%i\n",BUFFA);
    else printf("%s","Error.\n");
  }
}

>>155,157
I'd much rather do PHP than Sepples, Visual Basic, Java, and probably C and C#. PHP's standard library sucks, but the language itself is dynamically-typed, simple, and cleaner than Perl and Ruby (though dirtier than most others), and it's getting first-class functions and anonymous closures in 5.3.