What does Touring Complete mean?

Can someone explain to me what this is, in simple terms? Wikipedia can't explain shit

    HTML doesn't have classes. If you understood the divine structure of HTML, you would know there is no need for classes.

    You know, when I was younger I also used to wonder why there was no support for object-oriented programming in HTML. Back then, it seemed to me like OOP was the new cool thing that should be incorporated in every real programming language.

    But then one night in 2004, as I was writing my third HTML operating system, I had a great revelation. I saw the Document Object Model unfold in front of me. I saw the beautiful patterns of tags and attributes – the structure. As I witnessed perfection in its purest form, I realized how foolish and naïve I had been, having thought HTML would have any need to implement such a primitive paradigm as object-oriented programming.

    You might ask "so how do I accomplish [foo] in HTML then?", and the simple truth is that if you're thinking about the problem in object-oriented terms, your approach is the wrong one to begin with.

    The marvelous structure of HTML transcends time, space and reality. It is not something you can simply explain with words, you have to be able to feel the very spirit of hypertext within you. I hope one day you will be able to experience what I did.