programming fuck ups

What's the biggest screw up you ever made writing software?  Once a team I was on overshot a DCUT for some datacenter automation tools by two weeks, and it still ended up being shitty because the customer kept wanting to add shit.

Solution: if (0 = i)
Not if you want to set i to some return value from a function who returns a pointer:
int *i;
//...
if (i = functionWhoReturnsAPointer()) { //...