PHP is...

ok so I was happy with Ruby. But then I needed to take some more points in school and decided to take a PHP course since, well whatever. And at first things were, well, ok I guess, not glorious but I survived. And then my teacher said, "Great, now do the rest OO.". And now 4chan, please tell me what an idiot I am for taking a PHP course, or am I wrong?
So now my question is, wtf is PHP? (especially the object part)

>>7
Command line interface

>>8
Incidentally, PHP's web sight is PHP.NET...

>>9
Maintainability, liking it better (syntax, functional programming features), and the fact that I'm writing (as a hobby) the stuff it'd lack to be agile enough for quick system scripting.