A Message to Libertarians

I am awakened in the morning by my alarm clock at the appropriate time as regulated by the US congress and kept accurate by the national institute of standards and technology and the US naval observatory, a clock powered with the electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the US department of energy. I groggily rise out of bed and stumble into the shower to bathe myself in clean water provided by the municipal water utility using soap approved by the department of consumer affairs. As I dry myself I flip on the TV to one of the FCC regulated channels to see what the national weather service of the national oceanographic and atmospheric administration determined the weather was going to be like using satellites designed, built, and launched by the national aeronautics and space administration. I then proceed to eat my breakfast composed mostly of derivatives of subsidized corn, inspected by the US department of agriculture inspected food and take my allergy drugs, both of which have been determined as safe by the food and drug administration.

Thanks to the Cash for Clunkers program I then get into my national highway traffic safety administration approved automobile, having been licensed to do so by the state, and set out to my public school on the roads built by the local, state, and federal departments of transportation, possibly stopping to purchase additional fuel of a quality level determined by the environmental protection agency, using legal tender issued by the federal reserve bank. Using the GPS system designed by the navy and maintained by the department of defense I check that I am, in fact, on the correct course. On the back from public school I deposit any mail I have to be sent out via the US postal service.

Communications: So many different types of protocols and standards that the entire system collapses. If it doesn't, then a monopoly forms (this goes for all purely privatized systems).
Absolute nonsense. All private entities gravitate towards a common protocol.

For example, take the IP/TCP protocol standard used by virtually every web browser and HTTP website in the world. It was designed by the IEEE, a non-government organization.

Or the HTML, CSS and Javascript languages that all browsers and websites make use of. All highly standardized by non-government entities.

Fail.