Every “Baptist Day” the school would invite one of the greatest minds to lecture in the theological education center. One year they invited Dr. Paul Tillich. Dr. Tillich spoke for two-and-a-half hours proving that the resurrection of Jesus was false. He quoted scholar after scholar and book after book. He concluded that since there was no such thing as the historical resurrection, the religious tradition of the Church was groundless, emotional mumbo-jumbo, because it was based on a relationship with a risen Jesus, who, in fact, never rose from the dead in any literal sense. He then asked if there were any questions.
After about 30 seconds, an old preacher with a head of short-cropped, woolly white hair stood up in the back of the auditorium. “Docta Tillich, I got one question,” he said as all eyes turned toward him. He reached into his lunch sack and pulled out an apple and began eating it. “Docta Tillich (crunch, munch), my question is a simple one (crunch, munch). Now, I ain’t never read them books you read (crunch, munch), and I can’t recite the Scriptures in the original Greek (crunch, munch). I don’t know nothin’ about Niebuhr and Heidegger (crunch, munch).” He finished the apple. “All I wanna know is: This apple I just ate—was it bitter or sweet?”
Dr. Tillich paused for a moment and answered in exemplary scholarly fashion: “I cannot possibly answer that question, for I haven’t tasted your apple.” The white-haired preacher dropped the apple core into his crumpled paper bag, looked up at Dr. Tillich and said calmly, “Neither have you tasted my Jesus.”
>>5
That is the stupidest fucking no-applicability story that I have ever heard. The "old preacher" may as well just have said "I'm a little dolly wolly and you herd I liek Jezuz", for all the applicability to the conversation at hand.
WHY ARE RELIGITARDS SO ... WELL, SO RETARDED?!?!
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Anonymous2007-10-09 5:02
Dr. Tillich paused for a moment and answered in exemplary scholarly fashion: “I cannot possibly answer that question, for I haven’t tasted your apple.” The white-haired preacher dropped the apple core into his crumpled paper bag, looked up at Dr. Tillich and said calmly, “Neither have you tasted my Jesus.”. Dr Tillich replied, shocked and stammering “You sick bastard that's a disgusting thing to say, we're in a school you know, what a bad examp-”. The old preacher interrupted “wait, wait. I don't mean I literally tasted him, I mean I know Jesus”.
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Anonymous2007-10-09 11:59
THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER EXISTS! I SAW HIS NOODLY APPENDAGES IN AN ITALIAN RESTAURANT AT LUNCHTIME!
>>8>>10
Yes, that that's mountains of proof for the Flying Spaghetti Monster, as opposed to the BIJITS (BIg Jew In The Sky), for which there is NO evidence whatsoever.
Judeo-Christian can kiss my ass. They believe in the fucking tooth fairy and they should be ashamed at being so intellectually bankrupt.
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Anonymous2007-10-10 11:47
God isn't Jewish. He/she/they doesn't/don't have a religion. Humans have religions. They make up rules and blame it on God.
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Anonymous2007-10-10 11:47
The Buddha says you'd better not care whether gods (including God as a matter of course) really exist.
Musashi Miyamoto, one of the most famous samurais, said "I just pay respect to gods if any but don't depend on them."
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Anonymous2007-10-10 11:50
and where'd the Buddha say that?
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Anonymous2007-10-10 11:51
although I agree with him about not caring about whether or which God(s) exist(s).
>>12
PRODUCE EVIDENCE FOR THIS "GOD" OR STFU AND GTFO!
"GOD, GOD, GOD"! All you fuckers talk about is this THING that you have ZERO EVIDENCE for! Do you have any idea how fucking STUPID and INFANTILE you really sound?
For the first time, I think you have a point there!
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Anonymous2007-10-12 16:46
Just a simple question; Why is it whenever Atheists get there ire up about god and religion they always argue about it with Christians? I never hear in these threads about how Allah and His Prophet Muhammad don't exist, or about the Jews who tell the Muslims they're wrong?
Aren't you guys supposed to deny the existence of any god, not just the Christian god?
>>18
The vast majority of religitards where I live is composed of Christians. I often say "Judeo-Christians" to encompass more of what I mean. Of course, Islamafags are included. Anyone who worships a deity without any shred of proof whatsoever is to be considered intellectually infantile.
>>21
Yes, that's right: Judeo-Penisians. Why do you think Jews cut cocks at birth? They want a piece of their own lord.
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Anonymous2007-10-13 15:54
>>22 Christians aint that much better. What's with that piece of tortilla and wine that your priests and reverends consider to be the blood and body of Christ?
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everybody sucks2007-10-13 16:04
Atheists: spend too much time whining about Christians.
Nazis: spend too much time whining about and beating up Jews.
Muslims: bomb people. Nuff said.
Buddhists: too wimpy to pick a fight.
Jains: even more wimpy than Buddhists.
Hindus: Don't know if they believe in one God or Many, have confusing temple sculptures, have movements and religions all over the place while pretending to be one religion, and are just plain confused.
Shinto: the old religion that is part of how Japan managed to get past Buddhism's wimpiness. But which gods and which goddesses are which gods and which goddesses, or are they all supposed to be the Buddha? And what's with those pesky water kappas anyhow?
Confucianism (Confusionism?): too father-centric and duty centric (obey Daddy! do nothing for yourself!), but also part of how Japan dealt with Buddhism.
Taoists: are too obsessed with Ying and Yang.
Maoists: wave little red books till you're sick of it.
Communists: sing and parade until you're sick of it.
Rastafarians: *cough* *cough* marijuana smoke! *cough*
Baha'i: go a-whoring after yet another "prophet"
Mormons: Boring
To be honest though, you have no right to push your belief in the great nothing explosion (whose reason is so far unproven) upon other people. No right at all. How would you like it if some Christian turned up and kept shouting GOD EXISTS PROVE ME WRONG in your face?
>>25
Wake up, failfag! The Christianazis scream that in our faces all the fucking time. They constantly work in America to make this a "Christian nation". So ... FUCK YOU! Fuck you right in your stupid ass.
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Anonymous2007-10-13 18:18
>>16
beleiving in God, in the christian sense, requires a "leap of faith" yes thats the correct term for it; if there was a proof for God it wouldnt be a religion anymore but just a person/thing/whatever - since he is a religious figure there is no way a christian can prove he exists to you, you just have to beleive, its what makes it religeous. now stop caps'ing it doesnt make you look cool
>>27
No matter how you describe it, what's happening is not only lacking any evidence whatsoever, but in addition, there should be monstrous amounts of evidence to support the assertion. Since there is ZERO, then the assertion of faith is completely invalid.
So, it appears "faith" counts on something being provably FALSE. You fucking LOON.
Because they all worship the same god. Jews, Christians, Muslims. Same big daddy figure who lives in the sky. From the same region of the world. Same desert wandering, hallucinating, dehydrated, bloodthirsty, cult of personalities. Through an earthly demi-god there are promises of big fuzzy-bunny things after they die by following a list of rules and regulations, some of which pleases the followers, some of which makes them more malleable to whomever is in control of the cult. You break the rules, you get punished and you don't get to hang with the Sky Daddy in the End.
It's a time-worn theme, the big three are just variations on a theme. If allowed to gather and fight it out without intervention, they'd finish it and the religions would die with a loud bang and a profound sigh of relief from those of us who are too sensible to believe in Sky Daddies.
Muhammad DID exist. There's loads of evidence to prove it. Unlike Jesus, who was an illiterate bastard, Muhammad actually knew how to read and write. He wrote down the shit that Muslims follow, or dictated it to others. The problems didn't start until he died. Mostly because he was a hypocritical whore who couldn't keep his dick in his pants.
According to the Bible, Jesus just blathered away unrestrained. Then thirty to fifty years later, some of his slathering fan-boys wrote what they could remember or passed along the stories to their slathering fan-boys.
On the other hand, there's practically no hard evidence except the Bible that says an individual like Jesus existed. In fact, outside of Christianity, there are lots of people who think he didn't exist, or that he was just some raving loony who collected other raving loonies. There were a lot of raving loonies then. It was probably the heat.
Ditto with Moses. He was absolutely raving. The dude talked to BUSHES. Plus, that book is disgusting. Anyone who has ever read the Old Testament and still thinks that the deity of the text is a good and kind god needs to check in for their next round of rabies shots.
No one takes Hinduism seriously. Even Hindus laugh behind their own hands at Hinduism.
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Anonymous2007-10-14 2:41
Mohamed declared that nobody should record his life or live as he did. He knew he was a fucked up person.
Of course, what did he know? Muslims treat the Hadith like he'd told everyone to emulate him like Jesus did.
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Anonymous2007-10-14 3:11
Atheists are even more deluded than christians/religionfags. There is no proof that there is no higher power, but it is probably the most logical explanation of how our universe was brought together, though probably not exactly the same way relgions try to interpret it. Saying that it is completely unpossible and plugging your ears is just ignorant.
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Anonymous2007-10-14 7:18
Nazis and Communists aren't religious groups, dipshit.
1. Said higher power is alleged to intrude into the universe with some frequency.
2. No evidence exists of these alleged intrusions.
Now, either the allegations of the intrusions are false, or the assumption of the existence of the intruder are false. WHICH IS IT, CHRISTFAG?!?! Either your "god" exists and has no bearing on our own existence, or it doesn't exist at all. CHOOSE!
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Anonymous2007-10-14 13:49
Whether or not "God" exists isn't really an issue for me. I'd like to embrace the atheistic point of view. Because if there is a God, I reject him. All this suffering, and for what? To win an eternal reward? Well, "God" can shove it all up his heavenly ass. I refuse to waste my life trying to earn points for some kind of ethereal future in the clouds, sitting beside a vengeful, indifferent master, growing fat on the heinous crimes and tragedies, the frenzied, childish prayers of a broken and desperate humanity.
I understand a human beings need for such comfort, and I even find that beautiful. I was moved to tears in the Vatican in Rome last November, but not in praise of our holy father. I was awed and moved by the immensity of human endeavor, human passion and emotion, the beauty human beings create from their pain, the art, the paradigms of belief. Amazing.
And so the man-god will rise from the ashes of the fictitious father above...
Why do you call me a "giant pussy" for rejecting God? Or, more accurately, the idea mankind has labeled "God?"
I'm not knocking it, as Plato said: "He was a wise man who invented God."
I'd love to debate the issue. If you can actually produce a coherent and intellegent thought beyond the realm of giant pussies and ass-kicking. And perhaps learn how to use punctuation. Just a thought...