I ate early. I have no regrets.
All of the local stores at the mall appear to be closed. Black Friday is serious business. That girl wasn't kidding when she was singing about insane people on a doomed Friday.
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Do you really expect me to believe that I can recover from all possible "Stab-wounds" by stomping on "Turkey" that fell out of a dumpster I punched? Why am I punching a waste receptacle in the first place?