Dear Librarians

Thank you for looking after all of those books and documents.

Most librarians I know are idiots. I mean, I don't know about you, but I'd expect a librarian to be better read than an English teacher. English teachers read the same books over and over again, grade papers, and drink themselves to death. Librarians put books back on shelves, sure, but they SHOULD be able to get quite a bit of reading done, shouldn't they?

The real problem with teachers drinking themselves to death, is that they don't arrive at death quickly enough. They tend to die after a full career of damaging the urge to learn in students.