How do I join the Italian Mafia?

The Cosa Nostra. Can I put brown contact lenses in, dye my hair black and speak like Mario. Hay awhatsa a happening! Mama mia!

/lounge/fags confirmed as basement dwellers who've never even been to Italy, let lone met the maffia bosses like I did this one time. Get on my level or get back to your basements, QED.