That was SEPPLES quality!

malloc();

The anusalloc() function obtains the requisite amount of the anus resource from the currently available anus pool(e).

Problems arise when the POOL(E)'S CLOASED (due the the setting of the !AIDS signal), so make sure you properly trap errors when calling anusalloc().

Note well that the anusalloc() function was written by Richard Goins of AT&T in 1989.