Rape victim

me and my boyfriend were having sex the other night, and he asked me for anal. I've done it once before with him and didnt really enjoy it but it didnt hurt so i thought it would be fine again, not realising last time i dont it i was very drunk which must have helped alot.

this time it was so so painful even with lube (he is very big i have trouble takin him normally sometimes).

I kept tellin him it was hurtin and he was sayin he wud take it gentle, it was hurtin that badly i started cryin and shaking, and he kept asking me if it was hurtin and i kept sayin yes. this went on for about 10 minutes and he eventually stopped and i ran to the bathroom cryin and wouldnt let him touch me for the rest of the night.

i eventually told him the next day why i was so quiet and unresponsive, that he had hurt me in more ways than one. one doin it, then 2 it hurt me to think he didnt care and still done it when i was upset and in pain.

this from the man that has said from day one that i am the one,he will marry me, and we will have kids, we are meant to be together.

then he goes and treats me like a toy...........

i dont no what to do, i could never carry on wit something if i new it was hurting someone.

im not sure i believe he loves me after this, i am so close to finnishin it, i would have already if it wasnt for him begginin for forgivness and cryin.

The American student Elizabeth Smart has, for the first time, described her nine-month kidnap ordeal after being snatched by a stranger from her bedroom in Salt Lake City seven years ago.

Taking the stand for the first time Ms Smart, now a 21-year-old college student, testified yesterday that her captor had raped the then-14-year-old three or four times a day, kept her tied up with a cable around her leg, and threatened to kill her if she tried to escape.

Asked by a prosecutor to describe Brian David Mitchell, the self-described prophet accused of holding her captive for nine months, Ms Smart replied: “Evil, wicked, manipulative, stinky, slimy, greedy, selfish, not spiritual, not religious, not close to God.”

Ms Smart gave her horrifying account in federal court as part of a proceeding over whether Mr Mitchell is mentally competent to stand trial.

The 55-year-old one-time street preacher has been behind bars since 2003 — mostly in a state mental hospital — but has yet to stand trial. Twice he has been ruled mentally incompetent in state court, and he has often demonstrated bizarre behavior, including incessantly singing hymns in the courtroom and once yelling at a judge to repent.

Ms Smart testified that within hours of her 2002 kidnapping at knifepoint, she was led away to a secluded mountain campsite and in a quickie ceremony became the polygamous ‘wife’ of the older man.

“After that he proceeded to rape me,” Ms Smart said, sharing for the first time publicly her account of the ordeal.

She said Mr Mitchell showed her pornography and plied her with alcohol and drugs to lower her resistance to his sexual advances. Once, Ms Smart said, she tried to fight Mr Mitchell off by biting him.

On the stand for nearly two hours, Ms Smart was poised, her voice never wavering. She did not come face-to-face with her alleged tormenter. Mr Mitchell was removed from the courtroom for disruptive behaviour — singing hymns — before Smart arrived, and watched the proceedings from a holding cell.

A federal judge ruled earlier this week that Ms Smart's testimony is relevant to the question of Mr Mitchell's competency. The competency hearing is not set to begin until November 30, but Ms Smart testified early because she is going on a religious mission for the Mormon church in Paris.

Ms Smart's parents and other family members were in the courtroom to support her. Her father Ed Smart had already heard much of the story but said later outside court he had learned a few new details. He did not elaborate.

“She actually wanted to face him,” Ed Smart said. “She asked if he could be muzzled and sit and watch.”