Using the toilet seat? U are filth

I felt disgusted when I sat on the toilet seat even at home. YOU KNOW people pee on it and just clean it with paper after that. I used to get these weird itches on the insides of my thighs after using the toilet and had to get a shower immediately. Fucking disgusting.

Plus, my dick used to touch the slimy, dirty, cold inside of the front of the toilet. I had to put toilet paper between my dick and the toilet.

Life is good now.

>>2
To add to >>4's analysis, you also fail because you put that unwieldy, out of place explanation in parenthesizes right in the middle of your parody. Awful attempt, son. Please never attempt humor again, thank you.