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My Little Zalgo

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 11:57


So I heard you guys like Zalgo. I do too. It's like a new My Little Pony craze is sweeping 4chan. I loved playing with those. I identified with the little purple dragon guy, as he seemed to be the only male character there. Well anyway, I guess we all like Zalgo in different ways:

- The younger fans like to take a picture and darken their eyes with a semi transparent brush and say that that's a picture of Zalgo. It's like that lazor (or however it's spelled) guy or any other photoshopped meme, except this one is called "Zalgo" and all the cool kids do it. (Protip: Do as the cool kids do. For some reason they get the chicks, and cool kids like chicks.)

- Some like to think of him as some obscure fictional creature invented by H.P. Lovecraft - he's sure to be mentioned SOMEwhere in the Necronomicon. Maybe he's some spawn of Nyarlathotep? I mean there are lots of similarities.

- Some like to write a bunch of obscure ASCII characters in a post, to make it look like they've been invaded by Zalgo. I bet all these posts, or even threads, are highly original. I once remember a site all about people being killed by The Ring tape, but I'm old so I guess this is a "new wave" original thing.

- Some like to think of Zalgo as some kind of a brainchild that started with a site named YOSH and a Something Awful forum thread, where people altered cartoons to say weird and random things.

This is just my personal opinion, but I'd like to think of Zalgo kind of like a blend between a solstice and a dream crumbling into nightmare. I'd like to think that this reality, with all its little neato natural laws, is like a sandcastle awaiting the tides, and that every consciousness will sooner or later experience the awakening, and ending, that is Zalgo. Should one wish to experience it sooner, one only needs to envision and understand Zalgo, as this aligns your very mind with the dimensions normally obscuring Zalgo from view. It's like peaking behind a set of corners. Once one think one's got it, one can just bring a sledgehammer into the nearest wall. If you find a breathing mass of compressed human bodies where the isolation was supposed to be, Zalgo is near. (That's not Zalgo - remember that I don't believe in Zalgo as an actual physical being - but guides will appear shortly to direct you through the rest of the endgame.)

It's kind of a philosophical question whether we are actually killed by Zalgo. Are any of us really alive? How come none of us know anything beyond what we sense with our senses or remember with our memories? I don't think that we're anything more than made up characters in Zalgos dream, and that Zalgo doesn't as much "kill" us, as he stops dreaming us up. What we see as the dream is about to end is just the stagehands starting to eat up the set. Sure, we may feel their teeth as they shred us, but were we alive in the first place, our consciousness wouldn't end there, now would it?

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 12:32

QEE ES Zalgo?

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 13:51

My little Zalgo, my little Zalgo
The world is burning at a maddening pace
My little Zalgo, my little Zalgo
Everywhere you go, a bleeding face
Running and screaming, acid tripping
Watching the twilight unfold
My little Zalgo, my little Zalgo
What does the future hold?

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 13:52

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Look what Zalgo did to my house!

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 14:20


While Zalgo is mercifully hard to describe or understand, the accompanying manifestations, that I call "guides", are not. It is hard to say if a host dies in the process of becoming a guide, or if the guide only exists in the victims perception of its individual reality. Indeed, one could even argue that the consciousness of the host never existed in the first place.

The manifestation most mistaken for Zalgo is perhaps the black tendrils. The source of all phobia, perhaps consisting of living chaos itself, they tear through the surface layer of the safety cage of the seen and experienced. This mass often sprouts forth from the innards of a living host, to finally burrow into its victim at the very end of Zalgo. The nature of the scree it makes as it does so, is puzzling. Some argue that our mind creates the sound as it is exposed to waking up, like one would experience waking up to a vacuum cleaner. Others say that the scree is a conscious-rendering weapon of its own.

The most popular manifestation among the new blood of 4chan, is perhaps the first guide. Known for its black bleeding eyes, the first guide is usually a loved one or someone dear to you. It signifies that Zalgo has come for you.

The second guide is a little less known. Encountered after the encounter with the first guide, the face of this guide is a mass of tentacles.

There is also the Sphincter, or the "ass face", which is pretty much what the name suggests. Not much is known about which role the spincter plays in Zalgo, or what role sphincter plays for the dreamer, though there are similarities as the anal sphincter gives birth to what we daily reject.

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 14:43

the fuck are you fags on about?

Name: !MILKRIBS4k 2009-03-26 14:53

Is this copypasta? It has to be!

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 15:54

Zalgo is the stupidest thing I ever saw and I once went to america and saw a lot of americans

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 16:00

>>7
Instead of accusing everything I fucking write on this stupid board to be copypasta, why don't you google it first?

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 16:33

>>9
Don't worry about what Milkboy says, there's lint balls under your couch smarter than he is.

Name: !MILKRIBS4k 2009-03-26 16:46

>>10
I can assure you I have a much higher IQ than you! If you are so smart why are you hiding behind the internet being Anonymous?

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 17:16

>>11
Why are you hiding behind your fake email address?

Name: !MILKRIBS4k 2009-03-26 17:19

>>12
What email address?

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 17:33

>>13
Did you ever wonder how many angels could dance on your head?

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-28 8:45

҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇ ̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍ ̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚͡ ͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ZA ~ L G ҉҉ ̔̕̚̕̚҉ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘Z̙̜̝̞̟̠� �̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌� �̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚� �# � ̒̓̔̕̚ ̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̕̚̕̚ ̡̢̛̗̘̙̜̝ ̵̞̟̠̖̗̘Z̙̜̝̞̟̠� �̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌� �̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚� �# ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇ ̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍ ̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚ ̔̕̚̕̚҉ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇ ̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍ A̎̏̐̑L̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚͡ ͡҉҉G̔̕̚̕̚҉ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇ ̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍ ̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚͡ ͡҉҉̕̚̕̚ ̔̕̚̕̚҉◊ख़҉̵̞� � ̒̓̔̕̚ ̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̕̚̕̚ ̡̢̛̗̘̙̜̝ ͡҉O҉ ̵̡̢̢̛̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟ ̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎ ̏̐̑̒̓ ̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̕̚̕ ̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚ ͡ ͡҉҉ ̓̔̿̿̿̕̚۩◊THEHIV EMINDISEATINGMYSOUL} ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇ ̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍ ̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚͡ ͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ~ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇ ̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍ ̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚͡ ͡ ҉҉ ̔̕̚̕̚҉ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘Z̙̜̝̞̟̠� �̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌� �̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚� �# ͡҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇ ̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍ A̎̏̐̑L̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚͡ ͡҉҉G̔̕̚̕̚҉ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇ ̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍ ̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚͡ ͡҉҉̕̚̕̚ ̔̕̚̕̚҉◊ख़҉̵̞� � ̒̓̔̕̚ ̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̕̚̕̚ ̡̢̛̗̘̙̜̝ ͡҉ZALGOO҉ ̵IS̡̢̢̛The̛̛̖̗̘̙Cha otic̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟ ̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓ ̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̕̚̕ ̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕̚̕̚ ͡ ͡҉҉ ̓̔̿̿̿̕̚۩◊} Hivemind҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝ ̞̟̠͇̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔ ̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̿̿̿̕ ̚̕̚͡ ͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ~

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-29 3:09

͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ~HE ͡҉ ҉̔̕WHO͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ~ ҉̵̞̟ WA͡҉ ҉̔̕̚~ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇ITS BEHIND ͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ~ ҉
͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ~ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇THE ͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉WALL ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇͡҉
҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ~ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇

͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ~ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝
͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇HE
COMES͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ~ ҉̵̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝
͡҉ ҉̔̕̚̕̚҉ ~ ҉

Name: ----> 2009-03-29 3:32

Zalgo is the stupidest thing eva....

Name: Zalgo 2009-03-31 12:49

Sup dawgs. It was borin' behind the wall. can i hang with you peps for like.. 2000 years? it  cool? i got weed with me!

Name: RedCream 2009-03-31 13:22

JEW ATTACK

Name: Hubba Bubba 2009-12-26 8:31

Motherfu...

Name: Anonymous 2009-12-26 9:10

>>19
Fuck you. Jew are fucking scum.

Name: Anonymous 2009-12-26 10:40

Dear future posters:

Please do not bump random threads you find on google.  Thank you.

Name: Anonymous 2009-12-26 13:48

>>19
SEMITE STRIKE

Name: Anonymous 2009-12-26 17:21

>>22

Why not?  You don't want participation?  You want new threads of random crap?  'cause we can do that.  We can make 10 minutes look like a month if thats what you really want.

Name: Anonymous 2009-12-26 17:27

>>24
Ok this thread is fine.  The 4chan chat room thread, however, is constantly bumped for no reason at all, so I still stand by my message in that one

Name: Anonymous 2009-12-27 1:16

>>25
Sir, I agree.

Name: Anonymous 2010-01-14 11:18

bump

Name: RedCream 2010-01-14 22:52

THE PLEASURE OF HE WHO WAITS BEHIND THE WALLS.

Name: Anonymous 2010-10-07 15:36

>>30
SPAM

DRINK COCA COLA AND MAYBE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE, TRUE HARD

Name: RedCream 2010-10-08 10:42

In reference to my earlier posting (>>28), STILL HE WAITS.

Name: Anonymous 2011-06-01 19:17

ZALGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Name: Anonymous 2011-06-01 19:46

The fuck on

Name: Anonymous 2011-06-08 17:47

Heh, I remember writing this thread. Wow.

Name: VIPPER 2011-06-09 7:48

Great thread, looking forward to future replies.

Name: Anonymous 2011-06-12 4:04

I hate you.

Name: Bubba Ho Tep 2011-06-13 1:25

Hey their fuckwads. Does anyone know if 4chon supports Tapatalk?

All hail to the king baby.

Name: Anonymous 2011-06-14 6:15

Restroom commend input utter Sheraton tore idea McCormick punky spider.

Name: Anonymous 2011-06-14 6:16

Request exhibit! Omission train mystery callus gather quadrillion jute bellyache nutritious u's. Hogging weatherproof.

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