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Middle school dances suck

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-25 0:54

It was the eight grade dance, and boy I was excited.  You see, there was this girl.  Allison.  She had long blonde curls, blue eyes, and a perfect smile.  I knew, that that night, I was going to ask her to dance.

So I put on my best suit and tie, a quick spritz of cologne, and hopped into my mom's mini-van.

Ten minutes later, I'm walking into the dance.  What a sight!  Disco lights spinnin, the DJ's blasting the latest jams.  And the girls, man!  Standing out from all of them, though, was my Allison.  She was...like an angel.  Her hair was all done up, and she was wearing a brand-spanking new dress.  But before I could check her out anymore, my friends came over with their dates.  They commented on what a great party it was, then asked if I was going to ask Allison to dance.  I played it cool, acted like it was no big deal.  But inside, my heart was pounding!  I knew I had to ask her soon, or I would never do it.

"Next song," I thought.  "I have to ask her."

So the next song starts.  It's "Yeah" by Usher.  All of my friends are already out on the dance floor, grinding with their girls.  Allison is standing out there, without a partner.  So I take a deep breath, and head towards her.  This was it!  I was going to dance with my queen!  It was finally about to happen.  I went around the last group of dancers when...

Allison was dancing, with a jock.  Freakin hate those guys.  I was standing out there on the dance floor without a partner.  I didn't want to walk back out and look like a total loser.  I had to think on my feet.  Play it cool.  Maybe do something funny, make people laugh.  Allison was close enough to see me.  So I did the first thing that came to mind.  I started grinding up on the jock.  Not full on crotch-to-crotch, but not your average bro-hug either.  Still, bad idea.  Everyone stops dancing and turns around to stare at me.  Allison's jaw drops.  She begins to speak, stops, raises her hand, and brings it down across my face.  There goes my dignity.  Then that jock sonuvabitch raises HIS fist, and knocks my lights out.

Next thing I know, I'm in the nurse's office with an ice pack over my eye.  My mom is standing there, and I can hear kids laughing outside the door.  Including Allison.

And that is why middle school dances suck.

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-25 3:39

same thing happened to me last week, except they were into it and we all came hard on the dance floor

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-25 5:18

grinding? WITH A JOCK?
lol...
you sir, fail, epicly,
but in a fuckin funny way

Name: !MILKRIBS4k 2009-03-25 6:15

>>1
So, did you get any in middle school?

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-25 10:27

>>4
Well, I almost sucked myself off once.  I had just about got the tip of my penis in my mouth, but then my mom walked in.  FML

Name: !MILKRIBS4k 2009-03-25 14:52

>>5
BRO, that doesn't count!

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-25 21:31

>>6
god you're an annoying faggot redcream. I'll put a sage on you.

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-26 20:52

Shit, bro, that was pretty non-deterministic of ya.

Name: RedCream 2009-03-26 22:15

>>7
Note well that >>6 is not RedCream.  Do a barrel roll.  NAO.

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-27 5:59

It is common knowledge that !MILKRIBS4k is just another alias that RedCream uses. Please don't feed his trolling

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-27 6:21

bawwwwwww

Name: RedCream 2009-03-27 12:02

>>10
FALSE.  It's common knowledge instead that:

SAGE = Seeks All Gay Experiences

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-27 14:51

>>11
you pussy

Name: !MILKRIBS4k 2009-03-27 14:58

>>13
Lay off him!

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-27 18:26

Somehow, I don't believe this story.

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-28 3:45

>>15
whats not to believe?

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-28 13:27

She begins to speak, stops, raises her hand, and brings it down across my face.  There goes my dignity.  Then that jock sonuvabitch raises HIS fist, and knocks my lights out.

That's assault, brother. Have them both charged then sue them for emotional distress. You get moneys and they will both have a criminal record now. Sweet revenge.

Name: RedCream 2009-03-28 13:29

SUE FOR TEH MONIES!

Name: !MILKRIBS4k 2009-03-28 13:31

>>17
Are you one of those pansys that sue over every little thing? Grow a spine son!

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-28 13:49

Name: RedCream 2009-03-28 14:06

SUE LIEK TEH JEW DO!

Name: RedCream 2009-03-28 14:07

TEH JEWS DO SUE, SO MUST YOU!

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