I'm convincing my class to smoke

Wednesday is my turn to present my persuasive speech to the class. I fucking hate the same old abortion/gun control/global warming bullshit so I'm taking a new approach: I'm going to convince the class to smoke cigarettes. It's going to be pretty sarcastic with badly extrapolated facts, but presented in a serious fashion.

here are some of the supporting points i use for each main point.

Thesis: Smoking cigarettes improves your image.
Main Point 1: Smoking makes you look sexy.
- of People's Sexiest Man Alive winners, almost all of them smoke.
- smoking makes you look older (i go into how looking older is sexy)
Main Point 2: Smoking makes you look rich.
- not everyone can afford to buy cigarettes, so when you choose to, you're clearly wealthier than them. i compare it to buying a Lamborghini in the face of people that cant afford one.
Main Point 3: Smoking gives you that cool/nonchalant image.
- lung replacement technology is improving. nothing makes you look more like you just don't care as when you tell someone you're on your second pair of lungs and still smoking.

if anyone has "supporting evidence" i can run with, i'd appreciate it.

It shouldn't be that hard to convince people to smoke.  A full 10% population share of the fuckers won't quit no matter what you do.    Like Dr. Dennis Leary said, you could make the cigarette packs black, with a skull and crossbones, and call them "TUMORS", and they'll still smoke 'em.

And you know what?  THEY ARE FREE TO DO SO.  In America, you're supposed to have the liberty to indulge in even self-destructive pursuits.  The anti-smoking nazis hate that freedom and they'll do anything to stop it.  So we should just SHOOT 'EM.