Been Lonely For So Long

I'm a 45 year old gentleman who has never been on a date. I've been out with groups of people (coed), but I have never have been out alone with a woman on an intimate date at all. I feel like my life is over, and I've nothing left. I've never asked a girl out.
I used to play with boys and girls, and thought nothing of it. It was only in high school where my problems began. I had the nerve (after some friendly prodding) to ask a girl to the prom, and she accepted. (wow) I was really happy, and had no problems. but when the day came, I had the limo, the tux, the corsage but I got scared and stood the girl up.
I just want to be able to meet, court, have dinners, go out socially, long walks, traveling, etc. That is what I would love to do, but for the last 25 or so years, it hasn't happened. I think that is one of the reasons my life has stagnated to the point of trying to commit suicide.

Being lonely is a bitch. It is painful indeed. One day, I would love to walk up to an attractive woman, start a conversation, and ask her out. But that seems more like a fantasy than reality. I really want to know what love is. Never having experienced it is making me grow older than what I am. Too much worry and stress is making me crazy. The best years of my life is passing me by, and it feels like I'm destined to always be alone. Suicide isn't looking bad these days................

Just letting the forum know where I'm coming from.
Thanks.....

However, I can't seem to know what's going on in my life. I always will feel alone.

Somehow, I just can't get out of this circle of negativity, and things are just getting worse. My life is crumbling around me, and I don't have a clue on how to stop the hurt and pain. I've really contemplated suicide. Really. The stress of everyday living is taking it's toll on me. I haven't the support, where I can go to and just talk to someone. I can't tell the friends that I have (the few close ones) I'm going crazy. Hell, they already think that I am nuts. I constantly talk to myself, waiting for an answer. But it doesn't come. I've lost my faith in GOD, and it seems that my destiny is already set.

I'm a failure, and wasted half of my life. PERIOD. I know I can't get it back, and it looks like the rest of my life will be the same way. Hurt; sorrow; pain; and loneliness will always be there. I've read most of the stuff in the forums, but at least the people here hae a close friend or a family member they can lean on. I have been alone nearly my entire life, and had to solve every problem, handle every situation ALONE. My problem solving skills (the little I had) are gone, and I'm at my wit's end. What the hell I can do more, but end it all.

I DON"T KNOW WHAT TO DO...............