So, I got my little niece pregnant

It happened a few weeks ago, on a saturday afternoon at the 50 year anniversary of my grandparents, we were just sitting on the couch all alone when suddenly my niece said "It's hot in here" and took off her shirt. She continued by taking off her bra. I took off my clothes and I started licking her vagina when suddenly she said "I had Reeses for breakfast!" and I replied "Candy for breakfast!?" we then put on our clothes and I walked away.

Dude, licking doesn't make people pregnant. Didn't your school's sex education teach it to you?

Gay story.

tl;dr

When I'm masterbating I like to aim my penis upwards during climax to see if I could catch my semen in my mouth.

>>5

You fail. All you have to do is roll backwards with your knees behind your head and shoot into your mouth.

>>5
>>6
Faggots