I've got a problem with my boobs

i've got BIG nipples.
they areee so BIG
im a GUY btw
so its not like i have a SMALL chest
just BIB boobs
and its like
i have a fucking ASS growing out of my nipples
its so crazy
i can GRAB INCHES and stufff and everytime i TRY TO LOSE WEIGHT, NOTHING HAPPENS.
i bet i can IMPRESS YOUR GIRLFRIEND~

Picture...?