an upd8 of me 2 u kno hu

HeHe remember dat tmie u gou grounded coz u puked... i did d same fin in Wales on New Years nite, it was my highlight of tha trip.... Like i went pubbin wid my uncle n his wife n like the 3rd pub i went 2 i went str8 2 d toilet n like after i pisssd i fell on the cubicle floor wid my pants around my legs coz i was dat dizzy n like i couldnt move. n like my aunt like kept comin to knok on the door n c if i was aight n i'd b like "im takin a dump".. n wen she finaly sed we wer gion somewhere else i gave it all i cud 2 get up n so i puuld my pants up n sat on d toilet n puuuuuuuuuuuuked... BLARGH! twas disgustingly awsum... mum sez i pukked coz i took hayfever n headache tablets that day... i say its coz i was deprived of alco fo so long... i duno if i alredy told u dis stori coz i fink iv got dementia coz im like gettin not smater here... aghr.

I feel like World War 2 is happenin all over again, however without the blood and guts..there might be if I don't go crazi without you (if anyone else was readin this they might think we are lovers but we are sisters, get it right!). You are a handsome (ha he ha ha) soldier beng shipped off, far far away from your faithful wife which is me, baking ANZAC cookies all day. These cookies arent really cookies, they r our commandments and when we eat our cookies is when we are practising our commandments. (my spelling has gone shot to shit, i dont know why...i used to be a spelling gun)..you are an awful person for leaving me but that is really selfish of me to say. you know the deal with me because it is always about ME ME MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE lol. there is room for you though, its a permanent position in my heart..eew tacky fuck that,lets just say you are very dear to me.