Why does university suck cock?

Up until 5 days ago I was happily going out pretty much every other night with my mates and getting pissed and high and fun things. However last friday I left for uni and have spent the last 4 nights getting bored shitless as no-one wants to stay out late, or even get that drunk (certainly not get high ), as they have lectures the next day. While  I expected this to certain extent as it is a pretty good uni I didn't realise it was quite this extreme.

Right now I can hear parties going on off somewhere in the far corners of campus but am too scared to venture out alone to find them any more since I did that on Sunday but ending getting lost and bored and drunk and vomiting all over myself. Evidence that uni really is this shit is the fact that I am having to post on 4chan  at 9:30 (british time) to keep myself entertained. I am really quite depressed by this, because I am sure this is my entirely own fault for being socially retarded as a result of having spent too much time lurking on deviant filled forums like 4chan. In fact I blame my current state of crapulence on you; those who populate boards such as this. You are all wankers and I hope you spend the rest of your life shitting glass.

>>3 is a yank and so is fat with a tiny penis. The fact that you were raped by a Brit (we're all gay over here) when you were 9 doesn't give you a right of hate us all. I deduce from you're 10-word contribution that it is the only sexual pleasure you will ever have, and as all British people are direct descendants of sherlock holmes I'm probably right.

I'm not going to say what uni I went to as I that would slightly increase the chances of meeting someone from the internets and that would kill me. I feel a lot better now anyway as I've started listening to some really loud emo. Knowing someone is as much a fucking worthless talentless attention whore as myself makes me feel a lot better.