How to explain 4chan?!

I keep bragging to my friends how cool 4chan is, and of course I use all the memes and shit, but they want to know what it is. If I tell them the site, I fear they will go to the wrong section at first *AHEM*/d/*AHEM* and be freaked out.

So how do I discuss 4chan?

4chan is like the inside of the only working stall at a very popular bar.  You sit inside, doing your business, and looking at all of the graffiti left by those who came before.  There is a pen in your pocket.  Go ahead, grab it, and scribble something down.

You keep going to this bar, and while you never actually meet most of the other patrons, you carry on meaningless conversations about topics to keep you busy while you shit.

And that's 4chan.