Similarities between tampons and firecrackers

So I needed a new bag to go to a convention or something, so I went into the old closet of bags that were unclaimed. I got this old backpack that I guess my sister used to use. It had some stuff in it, so I went cleaning it out. In the front compartment I found some fire crackers. They were white and long (but pretty thin). So just then my sister walked in, and she’s like,,,, “what are you doing?” And I’m like “Ah, I found some fire crackers, well, finders keepers.”

“Those aren’t….. fire crackers”

“Hu? Whadda ya mean? It’s shaped like one, and clearly has this string coming out which is obviously the fuse you light up”

“……….”

So then I look at it and start finding odd things about it which would make it seem as if it’s really not a fire cracker…. So I start to take it apart. After I realize that this really isn’t what I thought it originally was, I ask my mom, “What the hell is this? I thought this was fire works or something, am I wrong? Maybe I should light it on fire just to see”, and she’s like “……”

Yeh, took me a while to figure out it was a tampon, but how the hell was I supposed to know.


And maybe my mind is a little perverted,,,, but this got me thinking of fire cracker insertion… Anyone ever stuck one up there vagina b 4? Don’t suppose anyone lit one up in there…. Then again that would probably kill a girl….

There once was a girl named Alice
Who used a dynamite stick for a phallus
They found her vagina in South Carolina
And part of her anus in Dallas