Romance languages

Okay, I'm a fluent speaker of American English, and I'm planning on learning one of the so-called 'Romance' languages: the choice comes down to Spanish (probably most practical here), French (AAAAAAAA), and Italian (interested me ever since I read Catch-22).

So... which should I pick? And why?

Let's see...

Spanish: useful if you're American.
Italian: not very useful, even to other Europeans, but if you're into things like opera, literature, painting, the Renaissance, etc., then this is the language for you.
Portuguese: a not so popular language that's a bit more useful than Italian, but not much.
French: very useful, especially in Europe and Africa; a true language of business, politics and culture. I recommend.
Romanian: useful in Romania, Moldova and...and...and...err, that's about it! ^___^;;;;
Classical Latin: if you're into ancient history and literature, this is for you. But I warn you, it's fucking difficult. For some reason ancient languages tend to be more complex than modern ones.
Medieval Latin: if you think Muslims and homosexuals should go to Hell, and you like/want/aspire to be a God-fearing man, then why not?
Catalan: the least useful Romance language.