LotR: Not as good as the movies

I don't know about anyone else, but I found JRR Tolkien's book really dull and reading it was a real chore.  Big props to Peter Jackson for turning it into a highly watchable trilogy.

Both the books and the films were good but would have been much better if JRRT had thought of the following things:

-do away with the hobbits, they are pretty much useless.
-remove the entire plot about having to destroy the ring and have bilbo give it back to golum.
-make golum a bad-ass ninja, not some whiney bitch, he would be able to turn invisible with the ring after-all.
-have the main plot focus solely on legolas and the dwarfy bloke, gandalf and the king dude.
-make them meet with golum and have golum who helps them to kick everyones asses in the battles.
-make legolas not just an elf but a PIRATE elf.
-Make king dude a samuri.

How much more awesome would the books have been then?

A dwarf, a pirate-elf, a samuri king, a wizard and a ninja with invibility powers, saving middle earth... I bet if he were alive today JRRT would be kicking himself for not comming up with that.