The Closet Anime Watcher Manifesto

"1.    I watch Anime, sometimes fanatically, devouring whole seasons in one day, yet no one must find out.
2.    I shamelessly rape all forms of media in order to obtain information on the latest and greatest anime, taking care to keep a bushel of disposable e-mail addresses at hand in case a membership is required to view certain sites.
3.    No, I don’t want to read your blog.
4.    I may be a jock, nerd (but unlikely if still in closet), cheerleader, 30-year-old-pervert (i.e. Dad), or the quiet foreign kid at the back of the class who doesn’t seem to understand the language but still manages to surpass you in all endeavors. You’ll never know.
5.    My viewing schedule is similar to the Christ-in-dessert diet, in the sense that temptation is gallantly denied over long periods of time; however, likenesses cease sporadically when I will lapse in to an anime binge similar to the collapse of a desperately obese person’s diet.
6.    In school, I pay no attention to the various anime cliques or clubs as the case may be, and secretly fear their fanatic members, seeing them as appalling premonitions of a bleak future. (I must stress now that I have no desire to become a constant bubbly tribute to Japanese culture, sporting pants with indecent amounts of belts and constantly dropping various Japanese phrases that have been picked out of fan-subs: i.e. “nani?” “watashi-wa,” “onegai,” “kawaii!”…etc.)
7.    I understand and wield a powerful bittorrent client, in a similar way to a +12 mage wielding a wand of protection.
8.    I wish to be Japanese and slightly younger, only so that my hobby will feel more natural.
9.    I don’t seed, only leech.
10.    My biggest fear is discovery of my ignominious secret and widespread distribution of it to all my friends and peers by means of particularly descriptive and colourful pamphlets.

I don’t want to know you, do not seek me out. Though tempting, clues to my secret identity have not been laced throughout the preceding literature.

-Anonymous(duh)."

just finished. discuss.

What kind of fag is ashamed to like anime?

that fag

good answer

tl;dr

You don't seed?

Jackass.

8 and 9 pretty much fail

I can't seed. My HD is the size of your willie.

I'll have to agree with point 6.

cant agree with 6 any more.  its truth surpases all

Sounds like me except for 1, 2, and 8, on account of being Asian.

I agree with all of them, but saying that all anon are the same is blasphemy.

1.    I watch Anime, sometimes fanatically, devouring whole seasons in one day, yet no one must find out.
2.    I shamelessly rape all forms of media in order to obtain information on the latest and greatest anime, taking care to keep a bushel of disposable e-mail addresses at hand in case a membership is required to view certain sites.
3.    No, I don’t want to read your blog.
4.    I may be a jock, nerd (but unlikely if still in closet), cheerleader, 30-year-old-pervert (i.e. Dad), or the quiet foreign kid at the back of the class who doesn’t seem to understand the language but still manages to surpass you in all endeavors. You’ll never know.
5.    My viewing schedule is similar to the Christ-in-dessert diet, in the sense that temptation is gallantly denied over long periods of time; however, likenesses cease sporadically when I will lapse in to an anime binge similar to the collapse of a desperately obese person’s diet.
6.    In school, I pay no attention to the various anime cliques or clubs as the case may be, and secretly fear their fanatic members, seeing them as appalling premonitions of a bleak future. (I must stress now that I have no desire to become a constant bubbly tribute to Japanese culture, sporting pants with indecent amounts of belts and constantly dropping various Japanese phrases that have been picked out of fan-subs: i.e. “nani?” “watashi-wa,” “onegai,” “kawaii!”…etc.)
7.    I understand and wield a powerful bittorrent client, in a similar way to a +12 mage wielding a wand of protection.
8.    I wish to be Japanese and slightly younger, only so that my hobby will feel more natural.
9.    I don’t seed, only leech.
10.    My biggest fear is discovery of my ignominious secret and widespread distribution of it to all my friends and peers by means of particularly descriptive and colourful pamphlets.

I don’t want to know you, do not seek me out. Though tempting, clues to my secret identity have not been laced throughout the preceding literature.

-Anonymous(duh).

Fixed.

1.    I watch Anime, sometimes fanatically, devouring whole seasons in one day, yet no one must find out.
2.    I shamelessly rape all forms of media in order to obtain information on the latest and greatest anime, taking care to keep a bushel of disposable e-mail addresses at hand in case a membership is required to view certain sites.
3.    No, I don’t want to read your blog.
4.    I may be a jock, nerd (but unlikely if still in closet), cheerleader, 30-year-old-pervert (i.e. Dad), or the quiet foreign kid at the back of the class who doesn’t seem to understand the language but still manages to surpass you in all endeavors. You’ll never know.
5.    My viewing schedule is similar to the Christ-in-desert diet, in the sense that temptation is gallantly denied over long periods of time; however, likenesses cease sporadically when I will lapse in to an anime binge similar to the collapse of a desperately obese person’s diet.
6.    In school, I pay no attention to the various anime cliques or clubs as the case may be, and secretly fear their fanatic members, seeing them as appalling premonitions of a bleak future. (I must stress now that I have no desire to become a constant bubbly tribute to Japanese culture, sporting pants with indecent amounts of belts and constantly dropping various Japanese phrases that have been picked out of fan-subs: i.e. “nani?” “watashi-wa,” “onegai,” “kawaii!”…etc.)
7.    I understand and wield a powerful bittorrent client, in a similar way to a +12 mage wielding a wand of protection.
8.    I wish to be Japanese and slightly younger, only so that my hobby will feel more natural.
9.    I don’t seed, only leech.
10.    My biggest fear is discovery of my ignominious secret and widespread distribution of it to all my friends and peers by means of particularly descriptive and colourful pamphlets.

I don’t want to know you, do not seek me out. Though tempting, clues to my secret identity have not been laced throughout the preceding literature.

-Anonymous.

i love anime... in secret